July 18, 2008
As parents we need to understand that we have a responsibility based on love when rearing our children. Love does not mean meeting their desires but providing for their needs.
Unfortunately, parents confuse needs and desires. They provide for children’s desires based on their own desires and beliefs of what they think is a good parent. What is a good parent? Society believes it is having your kid go to the best private schools, wearing the latest fashion, taking them to Disney or buying them the latest video game.
So when a sense of entitlement overtakes our children to believe they deserve better and earning things is an old fashion way of delaying gratification, parents are to blame. Like the spoiled brat in the Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory we are producing rotten eggs. We all would want to give our kids better than was given to us. If you are thinking that because as a child your parents made you the victim of abuse or you were homeless then you are right in thinking that way. If not, and like most of us in society, you were brought up in a relatively average home and to think that you must give your kid better is an arrogant notion. We must strive for a balance of maintaining values and morals while seeking all that God has for us. As parents we have a responsibility like an employer to an employee. We have a duty to behave and perform in the most honest, dedicated, trustworthy way possible as to become a role model or mentor to our children. We are called as parents to love our children like our Lord loves us. To give our lives for the betterment of a prosperous future that promotes God’s righteousness and exposes Satan’s schemes. It is hard not to give our children our heart’s desires but at times doing so will sacrifice their godly future.
Love is patient and kind, not dumb and stupid. Many of our children are growing up as dysfunctional members of society and parents are to blame. Loving your kids too much is not the reason but not loving them enough to do the right thing. We are to discipline accordingly, praise appropriately and nurture our children into independence from parents so that they become self sufficient members of a community. And all discipline for the present indeed does not seem to be joyous, but grievous; but afterward it gives back peaceable fruit of righteousness to the ones having been exercised by it. (Heb 12:11)
As parents we need to understand that we have a responsibility based on love when rearing our children. Love does not mean meeting their desires but providing for their needs.
Unfortunately, parents confuse needs and desires. They provide for children’s desires based on their own desires and beliefs of what they think is a good parent. What is a good parent? Society believes it is having your kid go to the best private schools, wearing the latest fashion, taking them to Disney or buying them the latest video game.
So when a sense of entitlement overtakes our children to believe they deserve better and earning things is an old fashion way of delaying gratification, parents are to blame. Like the spoiled brat in the Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory we are producing rotten eggs. We all would want to give our kids better than was given to us. If you are thinking that because as a child your parents made you the victim of abuse or you were homeless then you are right in thinking that way. If not, and like most of us in society, you were brought up in a relatively average home and to think that you must give your kid better is an arrogant notion. We must strive for a balance of maintaining values and morals while seeking all that God has for us. As parents we have a responsibility like an employer to an employee. We have a duty to behave and perform in the most honest, dedicated, trustworthy way possible as to become a role model or mentor to our children. We are called as parents to love our children like our Lord loves us. To give our lives for the betterment of a prosperous future that promotes God’s righteousness and exposes Satan’s schemes. It is hard not to give our children our heart’s desires but at times doing so will sacrifice their godly future.
Love is patient and kind, not dumb and stupid. Many of our children are growing up as dysfunctional members of society and parents are to blame. Loving your kids too much is not the reason but not loving them enough to do the right thing. We are to discipline accordingly, praise appropriately and nurture our children into independence from parents so that they become self sufficient members of a community. And all discipline for the present indeed does not seem to be joyous, but grievous; but afterward it gives back peaceable fruit of righteousness to the ones having been exercised by it. (Heb 12:11)
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